The very first battle you fight every day is the one within yourself. The picture on the right is an unedited photo from my very first professional photo shoot. I'm 39 years old. This image exists because I've finally emerged from a cocoon of fear, self -doubt, brokenness, self-induced inadequacy, and uncertainty. This image exists because I've finally decided that my comfort zone needed to rest in peace. I'm 39 years old. I stress my age again because it took years of life happening and healing to be in this place. Let's be clear, the journey is far from over; but I am living in the skin of the best version of myself to date.
I'd be lying if I told you this day was easy for me because it wasn't. The camera makes me look more fearless than I felt, lol. What I will tell you is that it is important for you to step out of your comfort zone because there is no real growth there. Had I stayed in my comfort zone this blog nor this website would exist today. Had I stayed in the spaces that were familiar to me I wouldn't have walked through the life that was needed for #SlaySpirituallyInc to manifest. Had I held on to those that departed my life I wouldn't have the soul support I have today. There is not one thing I would do differently. There is not one person who isn't here that I wish was here in my life. Not one.
The biggest battle I have faced thus far has been the internal struggle to accept my own healing. Seeing myself through the beauty of God's lens was a process. I saw myself through what had happened to me and through the lens of decisions that I made. Needles to say, the image that I saw daily wasn't pretty. For years I looked at myself in whole mirrors and saw a broken, fragmented version of myself. Accepting God's love was one thing. Trusting Him to heal my heart and mind was another. That trust required me to set aside my plans, my thoughts, my will, and my way of being. It was not easy taking my hands off of my life. It was not easy trusting in a God that I had never seen. It was, as it turns out, the single best thing I could have done. You are looking at and will be reading the heart of a woman whose wounds have been bandaged and whose broken heart is being healed. Healing has required me to step out of the comfort of my will and rest in the presence of God.
I encourage you today to take your hands off of yourself. I challenge you to say "R.I.P" to your comfort zone. You may be what's holding YOU back. God can't bless a step you won't take nor a move you aren't willing to make. It's time to FLY! Healing is the first love you can choose to give yourself. I promise you it will SHOW.
Healing Is A #HeartPosture - Kesh. C
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